Whatsername
by Black Lumina Enchantress
Summary: Jesse has completly moved on, more than he should have. What does he do when something happnes that he can't explain? Also, slipped into the story, is Green Day's, 'Whatsername'
1. Prolouge

Prolouge

Jesse sprang up in his bed. Sweating, and breathing heavily. He looked down to his left, to see a girl sleeping there. Did her wake her? No, not entirly. She was a deep sleeper.

He quietly got up and went into the bathroom to wash his face. The cool water felt good against his hot, swaty skin. He looked into the mirror, and gazed back at himself. And thought to himself about what had happened.

A dream. It had only been a dream, but it seemed so real, and so familliar. He was in the woods. Running. Following a girl, except he didn't know who it was.She suddenly slowed into a walk, then stopped completley. He noticed where they were. At a spring. _The_ spring. He remembered the spring, but not the girl.

She tured around. "Jesse..." she said, her voice echoing. "You said you'd always love me."

And that's when he had woken up. He kept his mind fixed of her face. Her face. Her camll chin, with a tiny dimple. He cheeks flushed, and rosy. Her lips, full and red. And her eyes... oh her eyes. He knew those eyes. But maybe he had just imagined it all.

Jesse went back to bed, where Stella sat waiting for him. Stella, his latest girlfriend, in his life of blood, sex, and booze. This had beed his life, and he was happy... he guessed. He had forgotten exactly why his life has changed. Why he ran away from his family, why he had developed a personality he never knew before.

Whatever the reason, it was bad. He had completley blocked it out of his mind.

"Jesse, baby... you okay?"

"What?" he quickly turned to face Stella.

"Are you okay?"

"Yea... I'm okay."

"You sure?" she further in quired.

"I'm fine."

"What happened?"

"Nothing. Just a dream."

"Okay." she layed back down, but he still sat up thinking. "Are you gonna come kiss me good-night, or what?"

Jesse looked down at Stella. "Oh." Whoever that girl was, he'd find out. "You bet..."

Not the he cared


	2. How It All Happened

Chapter 2

Jesse was starting to go a little crazy. Or so it was suggested. By himself. He had spent the last two days spilling over old photograph albums, saved newspaper clippings, even looking through magazines. He had a feeling she wasn't just something his mind had made up. He had seen her somewhere before.

He found another little mini-photo album in his closet. He began to quickly flip throguh it. Most of the pictures he had were of him and his friends he met since he left his family. He was halfway throguh when Stella appeared. Though he didn't notice her presence.

"Jesse?"

She startled him. He looked up shocked but the very sight of her made his soften into a smile.

"Oh, hey sexy."

She smiles a wide smile. "Hi." She slowly climbed into his lap, still smiling, making him fall backwards onto the bed he'd been sitting on, and began to kiss him.

Jesse loved kissing. And anyone would love to kiss someone like Stella. But only Jesse could. She was his... for the time being. Stella was beautiful. But to Jesse, her kisses semed empty, and loveless. Did he love her? No. Not really.

But the sex was good.

"I didn't hear you come in." said Jesse, pulling his lips away from hers.

"That's because you must've been so wrapped up in whatever it was you were doing, to notice." Jesse looked away for a moment. "So what were you doing?"

"Oh, um...nothing. Just looking through some old stuff" His eyes drifted down on the floor, where the album had fallen. She turned to see what he was looing at, and saw.

:Still?"

"What do you mean still?"

"Well you've been looking through a bunch of paper and stuff for days."

"Oh. Hadn't noticed."

She gave him one last kiss, before laying down beside him. "Jesse?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you love me?"

Uh-oh. He hesitated for just a second before he answered. "Yea." He just lied do a girl about saying he loved her. He was going to Hell.

Oh wait, no he wasn't.

"Do you love me?" he asked Stella.

"Yes. I love you."

Ohhh, fuck. This was not good. He'd rather be in Hell then where he was right now. He had to leave. Again. Before she got too attachted, or before he really did love her. He was planning to leave soon anyway, so it actually worked out. Maybe Miles was right.

Because this sucked.

The next morning, Jesse woke up to find Stella asleep right next to him. Perfect. That just made it harder. But he had to do it. He packed a small bag, and kissed a sleeping Stella good-bye. He got on his motorcycle and took off.

He'd be back in a few days, find another apartment, then pack up and leave. That's the way it was.

He headed back to Tree Gap. He hated it there. He didn't know why, he just did. It was going to be hard to go back and explain everything to his family. But what would he tell them? Why he left? He didn't remember. So that made it worse.

Yip-ee.

Jesse arived in Tree Gap at dusk. And it was time to face the fam. Would Miles be there? Would it matter? Not really. When was the last time Miles had acted like a good brother?

He rethought that, and pronounced himself evil. He was. Miles was a good brother. Then he thought about Stella. She was lovely, and he felt terrible about leaving her without an explanation. But he had to find out who that girl in his dream was. And his parents would know.

In a matter of seconds after he Jesse had pulled into the driveway, he saw Mae run out of the house in excitment.

"Jesse! You've come back!" She embraced her son the moment he stepped off his bike.

"Hi Ma."

"Oh, Jesse. I've missed you so. Where have you been all these years?"

"I'm sorry Ma,"

"About what?"

"About leaving. I forgot why I left, I suppose it was to lead a normal life," Mae looked at him confused, but he didn't see." "But I came back, because... I need your help."

"My help?"

"Yea. Yous, and Tuck's, and Miles'..."

"Oh, sweet heart. Milies left too."

"H-He's not here?"

"No. I'm sorry, he's gone."

"Where?"

"We don't know."

Damn. He'd wanted to apoligize too. Great.

"Well come on, Jesse, let's get you inside, Your father will be glad to know you're alright."

They went inside, and as Mae promised, Tuck was very glad to know at least one of sons were okay.

Later, while they ate their dinner, Mae asked Jesse what is was he needed their help with. But an exhausted Jesse replied that he was very tired, and he'd explain it all in the morning.

So he slept. He hadn't been in this room, in this house in so long. His family had moved back to Tree Gap around fifteen years ago. Jesse left eight years ago. He left and went to New York.

There, he had become the man he had never wanted to be. But he had fun with that life. He started drinking, picking fights with random drunken New Yorkers, and had a few scars to prove it.. In those eight years, he'd been all over New York, after leaving about twenty girlfriends. He lost count. Most were one-night stands anyway.

But he was running out of cities in New York. He needed to pick a new state. Maybe he'd go to California.

About four girlfriends and four cities ago, he turned his life around a little bit. Less blood, less booze, same amount of sex. Thank God.

That was his favorite part.

Then he met Stella. She was a slut. Despite what he sometimes thought about her. She had zero morals and could be a bitch when she was drunk. Which was for often than not. But what he really wondered was what made him have that dream. Who knows.

The next morning, Jesse woke early. Before Mae and Tuck. He poked around his room a little bit, after he found he was unable to fall back asleep. He looked through of his desk. In the bottom drawer, he found nothing but a pile of oold photographs. So old the edges were all torn and frayed, and they were of a rusty brown color, and what was no longer white, but yellow.

It was a small pile, but he looked over them slowly, studying the faces. There were a few family portraits, thought he had no idea who the family was. Then suddenly he stopped dead at a single photo, and his eyes widened.

"Oh shit..." he mumbled to himself. He studied the photo. It was a young girl. With long dark hair. A smill chin with a tiny dimple. Flushed looking cheecks. Full lips. And those eyes. Yet no a dirty brown, he remembered that they used to be blue.

He remembered.

He still had no idea who she was, but he knew, he had seen her face before. But where? And why? Why did he have this picture? How could she be real? Why did he have that dream? What was going on?

_"Thought I ran into you down on the street. Then it turned out to only be a dream. I made a point to burn all of the photographs. She went away and then i took a different path. I remember the face but I can't recall the name. Now I wonder how what's her name has been."_


	3. Who Is She?

MadMood: You're the first to read! And review! Thanks so much! And I never knew anyone else who'd admit to loving Bowling for Soup, or even knew what the Faculty was! I have the soundtrack too! You're awesome! This is my first fic ever, so you make me feel all warm inside! lol

Disclaimer: I own no one. Except for Stella.

Chapter 3

The early hours of morning had passed, leaving the house full of sunlight and warmth. Inside his room, Jesse paced, and thought hard, nearly panicking. Not really, but close enough.

He was thinking so many things.

If it was only a dream, how could there be a picture of her?

Why had he had that dream?

Who was that girl?

What was she trying to tell him?

Where had he seen her before?

Was it the picture? Was that where he'd seen her before? Maybe. Probably. But something told him that wasn't it. And why did she say what she said? And for the love of God! Where were Mae and Tuck! They never slept late! It was ten o'clock for Christ's sake!

As soon as he though those very words, he heard the floor boards creak, Ever so slightly from the foot steps of his mother, signaling that she was awake.

Phew!

Jesse quickly threw on a shirt to cover his bare chest, placed the picture in his pocket and opened up the door. He quietly raced through the house until he ran into Mae.

"Jesse! You scared me half to death!" she gasped.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Ma. Is Tuck awake?"

"Oh, yes dear. Are you alright?"

"I need to talk to you," he half chocked out.

"About that help you needed?"

His eyes lingered for a moment down-wards on the pocket that held the picture. "Yea."

"Ok, I'll be right back. You wait here."

So he waited. For what seemed like hours. He thought his head would burst, it was so full of questions that layed unanswered. He wanted to scream. He wanted this all to end. He wanted this feeling gone. He wanted his life back the way it was, without a million memories he could no long remember.

"What is it, son?" The sound of Tuck's voice filled Jesse's ears. He turned around.

"Uh… yea," he pulled the photo out of his pocket. He slowly brought it into his view, then turned it to face Tuck. "Who is this?"

Mae's eyes widened. She looked at Jesse completely shocked.

"Who is this?" he demanded. "Do you know who this is? Whoever she is… she's driving me crazy. I need to know."

Tuck snatched the picture from Jesse's hand and turned it towards him. "Who is that? Who---? Who is _that_?"

Jesse couldn't speak. No one could. The room was silent. All three of them staring at each other. Finally, Mae spoke.

"What's happened to you Jesse? You up and leave us one day, we don't see or hear from you in eight years. And you come back and---" Her voice trailed off, shaking.

It was quiet again. Until Tuck spoke up. "Son, you mean to tell us that you don't remember her?"

Jesse wasn't sure whether to say yes or no.

Mae found her voice again. "Jesse… how could you forget he?"

He found himself breathing heavily. He was confused, Utterly confused. What were they talking about? He didn't know what to do. He did all he could think of, all he wanted to do. He screamed.

"Who is she?"

Oooo! A cliff hanger! Don, don, don! Not really, because we all know who she is, but it's cool all the same! Read and review! Thanks guys! I love you!


	4. All The Answers

MadMood- Thanks again, you rock!

Strawberry-Shortcake01- I didn't really mean for Jesse to be a womanizer, it just sorta happened, lol. Sorry!

mistygurl121- Yes, Lilly, it is Winnie.

Thanks for reading you guys!

Disclaimer- I own no one, and nothing. Except my brain and my imagination. Woo!

Chapter 3

"You said you'd always love me. You said you'd always love me..." The whispering voice echoed in Jesse's head until his eyes fluttered open. He slowly looked around. He was back in his room. How? Had the whole thing been a dream?

He hoped so.

Jesse sat up in his bed. He raised a hand to his throbbing head. Ohh God, this sucked. He wanted to go home. Of course whle there he'd have to find a new home. He didn't want to go home anymore. He was thinking of where in New York he could possibly go, when there was a knock on his door.

"Y-Yes?" he said, his voice cracking. He cleared his throat as his parents walked in and sat down.

"Are you feeling any better Jesse?" said Mae, full of concern.

"Wh-what?" He sighed. "What happened?"

"You showed us this picture," said Tuck, handing it back to him. "And said you didn't remember her."

Jesse groaned. "I was hoping it was a dream."

"What's going on Jesse? What happened?" Mae asked.

"I wish I could ask you the same thing." They looked at him, puzzled. "Ok. A couple of days ago, I had a dream. A dream of her." he explained, holding up the photo. "I don't know who she is. I know I remember her, and I know I've seen her face before, but I just can't remember who she is. Now I know you guys know. So please, who is she?"

There was more silence. Right now, Jesse really hated silence. He didn;t want silence, he wanted answers, dammit!

"Say something!" he demanded.

Mae swallowed, and opened her mouth to speak. "Her name was Winnie Foster. You met her at the spring. Many years ago, when we lived here before. She was the one person in the world, who knoew our secret."

"Why is she haunting me like this? What happened to her?"

"She died, son." said Tuck. "About fifteen years ago. She lived to be a hundred."

Jesse didn't know what that had to with anything. But at least he knew her name. Didn't he know someone named Winnie once? Oh wait, it was her wasn't it?

"I-I don't understand"

"Jesse," said Mae, trying to calm him down. "You met her when she was sixteen. Her family, the Foster's, were very wealthy, and owned the woods we lived in. When we found her, we made her stay so we could trust her. To make sure she wouldn't tell anybody about us."

"What does that have to do with me?"

"You two fell in love." she said smiling. "We all loved her, she was quite a girl.After a few weeks of staying with us, she learned our secret, as did another man who had been following you and Miles. He threatened to kill her if we didn;t show him the spring. But--" her voice started to quiver, and she suddenly stopped talking.

Tuck calmed her. "Your mther killed him, trying to protect Winnie. Her father found us, and while you and Miles got away, we were sent to jail."

"Winnie helped us escape." said Mae, wiping away tears. "But we couldn't stay there anymore and we had to leave. You told her to drink from the spring and that you'd be back for her someday. Then you said you'd, lover her forever, and... that was the last time we ever saw her."

"So that's what she ment." Jesse whispered.

"Ment what?" asked Tuck.

"In my dream, she said, 'You said you'd always love me.' But I didn't know what it has ment until, now." he saide raising his eye brows.

"Well now you know." said Tuck.

"But where did I get the pictures from?"

"Well, when came back here, the first place you went was to her house, to see her. But when you learned that she had died, her great-granddaughter, who lives there, gave them to you."

"Oh. Why did I leave?"

"Well, when she died, you must've died with her." said Tuck. "You weren't the same anymore."

Then Mae spoke. "You were always angry. You felt that she betrayed you, In all our years, you had never been like that."

"Then one day, you just left. Without a word. And never came back. Until now." Tuck finished.

"And Miles?"

Mae looked down, and Tuck spoke. "Left a few months ago. He'd already lost everything he had. Except his brother. And when you left..." he shrugged, figuring Jesse would know the rest. He did.

"I'm sorry you guys." Jesse said holding back tears. "I didn't know. I didn't remember, I couldn't. I-"

"It's not your fault, Jesse." said Mae, reaching for his hand. "You suffered a great loss. We all did."

"How could I forget her?" Jesse demanded, chiking back tears. "If she ment that much to me, to all of us!"

"We don't know, sweet heart." his mother replied. "I guess, in all your sorrow, and... depression, you tried to forget her. And it worked. And that's why you left. To forget."

"But why does she want me to remember?" That, Jesse still could not understand.

"You made a promise to her, son." said Tuck, standing up. "You don't have to remember the bad things, or what happened when she died. Just remember when she lived." And with that, he left the room, leaving Mae and Jesse by themselves.

"He's right, Jesse. You did make a promise." she patted his hand. "Keep it." Hesse looked away, then back at his mother. "Now you rest some more. It's been a long day. If you have any more questions about all this, we'll talk later."

She stood up, kissed her son on the fore head, then left the room.

Jesse layed back down. So that was it? He had all the answers, like he wanted. But now there was something else he wanted.

_"Seems that she disappeared without a trace. Did she ever marry old what's his face? I made a point to burn all of the photographs. She went away and then I took a different path. I remember the face, but I can't recall the name. Now I wonder how what's her name has been."_


	5. Dreams Turned To Memories

skatersluvme- okay then... keep in mind, I know who you are! Can't wait to read one of your stories! Thanks for the compliment, too, I'm updating now ok! lol.

Chapter 4

That night, Jesse fell right asleep, and slept for what seemed like an entire day. But his deep slumber was filled with dreams.

He was with Winnie, at the spring. She wanted a drink but he stopped her, and she ran. Then Miles caught her, and whisked her away to thier house.

Then he was climbing up a mountain of rocks with her, and side by side, they shared the view. Then they were swimming. He was carrying her in the water, moving around in slow circles as she leaned against him.

He danced with her, under the stars, to the sounds of the night around them. He held her tight as they twirled, and laughed in the darkness.

Then they lay by a fire, neither of them ever wanting it to end. And together they shared a kiss. Her lips against his, made him feel like he could fly. And he wished they really could be together forever. It was the one kiss, were Jesse could disconnect from everything else. The one kiss he ever put the most love into. The one kiss he wished would go on forever.

As Jesse awoke, he realized that they weren't just dreams, as he had thought. They were memories. Memories long forgotten, that might soon vanish again.

But not this time. This time, Jesse didn't want to forget. He didn't want to forget the memories of the one true love he ever had.

And he didn't have to anymore.

_"Remember, whatever. It seems like forever ago. Remember, whatever. It seems like forever ago. The regrets, are useless in my mind. She's in my head. I must confess. The regrets, are useless in my mind. She's in my head, from so long ago"_


	6. A Promise, Everlasting

Keep reviewing guys! I'm feelin lonley!

Chapter 5

Jesse still layed in his bed awake, in the middle of the night. The damn owl outside his window kept hoo-ing. He sat up in his bed. He was still trying to let what he had learned to sink in. He finally remembered. He remembered everything... and he was glad.

He couldn't go back to sleep. He realized that he had done a horrible thing. He forgot. Most importantly, he broke his promise to Winnie. He'd acted to terrible to his family, and now Miles was gone. Because of him.

His family forgave him. But someone hadn't. Winnie. He needed her forgivness the most. But how was he gonna do that?

Since he couldn't go back to sleep, he got up. Got dressed, and stepped out of the bedroom. The whole house was covered in a sheet of darkness, except for the moon light, spillin in, through the windows. He crept around the house, trying not to wake Mae and Tuck. It was three o'clock in the morning for Christ's sake.

Quietly, he stepped out the front door, and walked out.He walked slwoly through the woods, trying not to make much noise. It was hard to see where he was going in the dark, even though Jesse knew the land practically by heart. Especially the way to the spring. That's where he was going anyway.

He silently stepped through a threshhold of trees, and saw Winnie's tomb stone, leaning over what used to be the spring. The moon shone brightly on the stone, making it look like a shrine. He slowly walked over to it.

Jesse raised a hand to the tree. Lightly brushing his fingers across the 'T' Tuck carved into the bark. Then he knelt down in front of her grave, and whispered into the night.

"Hi Winnie," Jesse began. "I wish you were still here with me. We all need you. I wish I could've come back sooner. I wish I could turn back time, so I could tell you how much you meant to all of us. And how much I loved you. I love you still, and I'm so sorry I forgot."

He paused for a moment, as hot tears ran down his face. He hled back sobs as he went on speaking.

"I'm sorry. But you've left me here with no one! And I can never be with anyone again!" He shook his head. "Not forever."

So there he sat in the darkness of the night, for about ten minutes, practiacelly drowning in his tears, as all his pain, all his sorrow, came rushing back to him. But he wasn't done yet. He had to finish.

"Maybe I've had my happines, Winnie. You were it. What happened with us, was worth what we did. If we hadn't... I wouldn't of met you. And none of it would have happened."

Feeling happier, he smiles, and wiped all of his tears away. Then he stood up, and gazed up into the sky.

"So I'll be moving on again, soon. But this time I won't forget. I won't forget it ever again. I promise."

_"And in the darkest night, if my memory serves me right. I'll never turn back time._

_"Forgetting you, but not the time."_

End 


End file.
